I feel really bitchy saying this, but I’m going to have to open up and show my inner bitch if this blog is to be remotely interesting. There are a lot of things I don’t understand, like platypuses and certain indie movies that try too hard to be deep and end up making absolutely no sense, but there is one thing that I am confronted with day after day that I just can’t wrap my mind around.
"Ladies, I may be able to work out a deal where either one or the both of you could be pregnant by the holidays!"
Now, I haven’t been single since age 16, so I admit that I am short on empathy here. I don’t understand why some guys act like complete crack addicts trying to score a fix when approaching girls. Now, I understand that guys (and girls) can feel like addicts due to lack of sex. That makes sense. But why do the majority of guys I see approach girls with their freak flag flying high and proud? It actually seems like some of these dudes think that acting like the biggest slime ball ever will get a girl in their bed. Maybe it derives from high school. The assholes in high school always score the most chicks, so maybe the creepy guys who hid in the shadows just observe that, and then when they are older, they just think that’s the cool way to be. Or maybe these creepy guys are the assholes from high school who never threw in their varsity jacket for a sports jacket and tie.
I just want to know this: do 35-45 year old creepy guys who approach 20 year old attractive girls and say something like “wouldn’t you like to follow me home?” really think that’s going to work? I’d like to think that it is all for shits and giggles, but some of them seem damn determined.
Come on, guys. It really isn’t that hard to pick up girls. Why would you try to be the biggest creep (or are you trying?) possible and then act surprised and complain to your friends that you haven’t gotten ass in like two years?
